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What Your Kids Need to Hear from You During a Divorce

Just as you may be struggling to make sense of your divorce, your children will be going through a turmoil of emotions, no matter how young or how old they are. There are many things you can do to help your child successfully adjust to the changes going on all around them. This includes conversations, where you can make sure your kids are confident of several things:

  1. This is in no way your fault. Kids of any age are prone to think their entrance into the family is what started troubles in their parents' relationship. You have to assure them otherwise, and not just once either. You may need to assure them of this time and again.
  2. Confused, often-changing emotions are normal. You need to let your children know that it is totally okay and normal to go through periods of anger, sadness, perhaps happiness, and all in the same day and again throughout the week.
  3. We both love you. Your children have to always be sure of their parents' love, that their parents' relationship with one another might end, but nothing will end the parent-child relationship, not even a move or a divorce.
  4. We'll show our love differently. Kids may struggle to believe the above point, and they may start comparing each parent to the other, who has more time with them, who does more fun things, who uses the most money on them, etc. It is imperative that your child understands that the natural results of a divorce do not indicate a difference in love.
  5. It's not your job to repair the marriage. And your kids should not have to know the private things that have occurred between you and the spouse you're going to divorce.
  6. Marriage can be beautiful, and each relationship is different from the other. Just because you're divorcing does not mean that your kids will have to repeat this same process down the road, nor does your divorce mean that there is no such thing as an enduring, happy marriage.
  7. It gets better. You can encourage your kids that they will get through this, and that in fact, the family can all be happier because of the divorce, the hostile environment dispelled, a new chapter of life that can lead to better things.

Of course, to give you and your children the best chance at this stronger, independent chapter in life, protecting your rights in the divorce is crucial. Whether you are considering divorce mediation, uncontested divorce, or are faced with a litigated divorce, the legal team at the Meyers Law Group, P.C. may be able to help you achieve a fair result for you and your family. Find out how our divorce attorney in Long Island can provide the counsel and representation you deserve when you call us today!