So you hear all this advice about needing to communicate with your co-parent in as positive a way as possible, but how on earth is that supposed to happen, and what would that even look like? That advice might sound great, but as always, this is a task that is easier said than done. It is a good ideal to strive for, however, because chances are that you will still have to maintain contact with your ex because you two are raising kids together. So if co-parenting is an option on the table, there are three main solutions possible for pulling it off.
First of all, you may be able to change things up. Of course, this could look something like modifying child custody orders to create a more workable plan with your co-parent, but more simply, you could open the door to the communication that needs to take place. If you want healthy communication, sometimes this means that you will have to take the first step of supplying positive communication. Just keep things professional and cordial. It might even help you to pretend that you are strangers, and you are the friendly clerk behind the cashier. You might just find this type of communication reflected back to you, and even if it is only a partial reflection, that is probably an improvement.
Then again, the easier and also more effective solution can sometimes be to just stop talking to each other, and to stop seeing each other. Maybe you can reduce it to the bare fact-exchange it takes to get your children to school, to drop them off, or to communicate things about your divorce case. With minimal communication, perhaps this will give you each the time to work through your emotions until they fizzle out enough for you to take on solution one, trying out politeness.
Thirdly, perhaps change in either direction is impossible. Maybe neither of you will be able to budge an inch. But you can accept this. This can mean overlooking the rude comments you get, for example, knowing that you will get better at this ability to ignore your ex over time. Instead of chafing against the way things are, you and your children may be able to take things as they come, and then move onto what needs to get done that day.
The good news is that co-parenting lies in your hands, that choosing the right way to handle talking with your ex can create the most feasible arrangement. And if you are in the midst of a divorce, or if a significant change has occurred in your life that necessitates changing child custody orders, do not hesitate to
contact the Meyers Law Group, P.C. We have years of experience dedicated to helping families create the future that works for them. Work with an excellent family law attorney in Long Island today!