Many couples who already know that they are going to get a divorce are waiting for the holiday season to end first. There is a reason that January can be called "divorce month". The first few days of January see a lot of phone calls to divorce attorneys. It often makes sense for parents to wait for the holidays to draw to a close and their kids to go back to school, separating the pain of a divorce from the joys of the holidays. But how feasible is it for you to survive the holidays with your soon-to-be ex? Here are some tips to get through the season and to start preparing for your divorce.
First of all, you and your spouse will have to lay out the details of a truce. If you want to keep the holidays peaceful for your kids after all, you will have to agree to not fight in front of them, to keep mum about the divorce, and to still follow the holiday traditions your children love. So yes, if this is something you want to do, you will have to do it together. But this can be made easier to do if you also slot times for you two to be apart. Maybe just one parent can take the kids on a Christmas shopping trip at a time, for example. You might even want to take a couple days off from work, "mental health" days that can enable you to minimize stress now and in view of the impending divorce.
Now could be the perfect time to start up a new tradition with your kids. Just you and the kids. This could be a movie, ice skating, something fun that you can continue with your kids in the holidays to follow. And then you should allow yourself to enjoy your holidays as well. This can include keeping things positive with your future ex. Instead of making a truce a time of hostile quiet, you can start as cordial a relationship as possible so that you will have a healthy co-parenting rapport to move forward with.
As for the divorce, you do not have to put off the preparations themselves. In fact, right now could be a good time to start looking for your divorce lawyer, collecting your financial statements, assessing and writing down what you want from child custody and
property division, and maybe even to start searching for your next apartment or house. There is less pressure at this point, while the divorce has yet to be filed, and getting these matters cleared out of the way can make your New Year that much smoother.
To learn more about preparing for divorce and life after, contact the Meyers Law Group, P.C. You can find the dedicated Long Island divorce lawyer you need at firm. Ask us how our experienced legal team can help you and your family!