No matter the reason for the divorce, many people assume that the divorce
will solve their problems, help them regain pre-marriage peace, or propel
them to a simpler, happier life. Granted, divorce can be the way to a
stronger future, but it is a mistake to picture that it will be entirely
rosy. This is not meant as a discouragement, but to help soon-to-be divorcees
to have more realistic expectations, which can help them make the right
decisions for their future.
For one thing, divorce is not as simple as just eliminating your spouse
from your life, with life continuing on as it always has. No, just about
everyone feels the effects of a
divorce. Of course, if you have children, you are fully aware of this. But your
close friends and extended relatives will also be impacted, just as will
anyone who is involved in your life.
And this will probably mean a change in those relationships. The impact
will not just be emotional; it can alter the daily routine and the entire
course of others' lives. This is probably most true for your children.
Their family unit will be split, which not only means a difference in
breakfasts and dinners, but trips and holidays. They may also have to
move from their home, and if finances are tight, might even have to move
away from their friends and school. Totally uprooted, they will also be
shuttled from one parent's house to the other. These are tremendous
changes that you would have to prepare your kids for, and help them through.
And then there are other relatives to consider as well. What will this
mean for your relationship with your in-laws? If you have stepchildren,
will you be able to see them? And so on, throughout your social life.
Then beyond relationships, you will have to look at the seemingly mundane
things in your life. Where will you live? Will you have to downsize? Perhaps
you will have to stay with your parents before you can go ahead and get
a cheaper house. What about watching over your kids? You will have to
figure out whether you will need to reduce your overtime, or you may even
have to consider getting a different job. Will you have to move then,
and will you have to
move with the kids? Perhaps you will have to go back to school in order to get a better job.
In fact, you will have to take a long and hard look at your financial situation.
Will you have to make
support payments? Will you need the support payments yourself? You will have to consider
what you will need financially moving on, and whether or not this could
necessitate your taking a second job. Then you will have to think about
whether or not you will have a car. Will you need to get one? Maybe you
will have to downgrade after selling your current car. Then you may have
to calculate how much more you will need to pay in gas just for transporting the kids.
There is no getting around it: divorce is hard. But if you are aware of
what you are up against, not overlooking the details of what lies ahead,
you can be prepared to your divorce, and make the most of it. While there
is nothing simple about divorce, it is possible to achieve a peaceful
resolution, which can make way for a better, happier future. To help you
plan for this future, you will need the best Long Island divorce lawyer
you can find.
Contact the Meyers Law Group, P.C. today to learn how our experienced team can help you and your family with
compassionate and skilled representation.